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to the heart of the mountain

by beholding

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1.
i'm a hard working mountain surveyor i live on the edge of the world i'm a tirelessly trekking mountain surveyor and i live on the edge of the world i learned all about cutting up trails in the rockies rain squalls and sheer ice too i've been told that it's dangerous alone in the mountains there's nothing i would rather do i'm a hard working mountain surveyor i wake up before dawn i float on the shale and i breath in the mist i'll keep doing it til i'm gone on my days off i go down to the lake this time i swam away from my friends i swam to an island off in the distance i stayed there until it got dark and when it got dark and the crickets were singing i climbed on top of a tree and on top of that tree i stared at my mountains and a little light stared back at me so the next day i woke up before dawn i had my coffee on the sand i followed the light into the mountains and no one ever saw me again
2.
summit 07:19
3.
light song 04:18
little light in the mountain will you let me know your name and will i last forever if i make myself the same little light setting in the river i thought you showed me what was mine but then i felt a cold wind passing with the passing of the time little light in the mountain i left to know your heart and i think i'd last forever if you show me where to start little light in the sky i thought i heard an angel sing then i felt my feet on the ground and i knew that it was nothing little light all around me i see those shapes in the stars i remember knowing nothing and it's all i'll ever want fading light all around me and now the screaming wind now the wolves are howling i see those shapes again little light in the mountain i don't know what you are help me make it home okay just tell me where to start
4.
wolves 05:21
there's no mountain left to conquer there's no light on the mountain no friend by the water there's no way to know we're coming and the sky is breaking westward the blank moon hardly breathing there's no clearing at the end no worry and no sorrow no little light to follow there is one lengthening shadow no body left unbroken we are closer still your light your heart your light
5.
now that i'm lost in the mountains now that i can't come down now that the sky is breaking westward now that i can't come home here's where i was just a kid making silence into singing stars meant heaven or nothing now that there's wolves at my back here's where the dust meets the sky and they talk like old friends the old pine weeps at their spinning found my only friend in this place i hear wind screaming and howling i'm so scared of everything now that i'm lost in the mountains now that i can't come home i'll make it all okay i'll make it all alright i'm gonna make everything okay i will fix everything that's broken water runs rampant and wild from the heart of the mountain gives into dirt and roots and i cry at my friend the trees they say: "you're not just a shape in the ending" and: "tell those assholes what they are" "you are fleeting and alone, and you are clear and free" but it's freezing and it's dark and i don't know what you are i don't know what i can give you they say: "give your heart back to the dirt" now that there's wolves all around me i miss my family now that i'm lost in the mountains now that i can't come home i'll make it all alright i'll make it all okay i will make everything alright i will fix everything that's broken still in the cold light of the moon i had a beautiful dream a kid throwing rocks at an old train in the warm light of spring catching fish just to see them throwing them back with a family by a fire with the wind screaming and howling and getting lost in the mountains then coming home i'm still coming home i'm coming home

about

a story about a mountain surveyor

from this world I think
that there is nowhere to escape.
i wanted to hide
in the mountains' farthest depths;
but there I hear the stag's cry.
-Fujiwara no Shunzei

credits

released November 20, 2020

all tracks produced mixed and mastered by beholding

license

all rights reserved

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about

beholding Kamloops, British Columbia

hi i'm lukas, thanks for listening <3

on Secwepemcúl'ecw land

for soundtracks
lukasvanderlip.bandcamp.com

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